Sweet Child of Mine

Questions through tears. .Silence in words.

Death and grief shouldn't be apart of childhood. Except it is. And for my kids it's a big part of their lives. 

They ask some rough questions. 

Where exactly is heaven? 

 Oh sweetness, how I wish heaven was a place on earth. It's simply not. It's above us somewhere but I can't say exactly where. 

Why can't we go visit there? 

 If we could visit heaven I would spend a great deal of time there everyday. We can't visit. Once you go to heaven you can't come back and you can't go until Jesus is ready for you. 

But mama I wanna visit the babies! 

Oh so do I. 

Mama I miss them. 

So do I. 

When Madalyn gets married and has a baby is it going to die too? 

Oh baby I don't think so. Most babies are born and live a long time and grow up. Like you. 

But our babies died. Why? 

I don't know. But Jesus does and when I get to heaven I'm going to ask him. 

Can Santa bring us a baby? 

No honey, Santa can't bring us a baby. 

I really want a baby. 

I know me too. 

I was going to help feed them. 

I know. You were going to help a lot. You are the best. 

I love you mama. 

I love you too Haleigh. 

It brakes my heart that she has to understand These things that I don't even understand. I'm trying but sometimes I wanna scream WHY too.